These days, a lot of partners are setting aside specific days to go on a romp in the bedroom with their partner. An unfortunate side effect of this, though, is that pressure is put on both of you to immediately be in the mood for that sort of thing. Often, it ends up not really working out because of that.
So, while the planning ahead isn’t the worst idea in the world, it’s important to establish that there’s still no pressure involved here. Once that’s sorted out, you can start to move on to the other tips being shared today.
One: Find Some Enjoyable Hobbies
This one probably sounds a bit strange, admittedly, but one of the first steps you can take to bettering your mood in the bedroom is to improve your mood outside of it, too. There are plenty of studies done on that, and plenty of other blogs have covered it as well – you can see that here: https://mindfulzen.co/healthy-mindset/.
Here’s the thing – when we are not feeling fulfilled in our everyday lives, it’s pretty hard to have that sensation in the bedroom as well. It’s important to practice mindful living in order to keep yourself in a positive frame of mind well before you and your partner get some alone time. Maintaining healthy habits is one of the first steps, and hobbies are a great way to encourage that.
Two: Let Tension Build Through the Whole Day
Getting in the mood isn’t a race, so it’s a good idea to remember that as you’re thinking about it. You and your partner have the entire day to get steeped in that sextual tension. Make the most of that opportunity!
Before you leave for work, offer some flirty statements. Tell them how beautiful they are or how sexy they are. When it comes to getting in the mood, you can let it take some time. Throughout the day, consider sending some suggestive text messages or even just tell them how much you miss them.
Sweet romantic gestures sometimes are just as appealing (if not more) than the outright sexual ones. Even the little things can make a huge difference in in how both you and your partner are feeling about each other. Reminders of your love for each other can help get you in the mood, though it may not seem like it at first.
Three: Communication is Key
In any relationship, one of the most important things to keep in mind is that both of you need to be open and honest with each other. There are inevitably going to be moments where one of you is in the mood and the other isn’t. While it can be frustrating at times, it’s okay.
That’s where communicating really comes into play. You can read about it more on this page, but it’s a make-or-break sort of thing in a partnership to have open channels to express your feelings to each other.
When one of you isn’t in the mood, it’s okay. There shouldn’t be any pressure put on to make love, but instead, a discussion about why it doesn’t seem appealing at that moment. Working through something like this is a great way to reaffirm your feelings for each other.
At the end of the day, there are a ton of reasons why you or your partner may not be feeling in the mood even when you had both intended to get in bed together that evening. Thankfully, it’s not impossible to work through that sort of stuff. Keep those channels open, though, and let them know that there is no judgement either way.
Libido is a difficult beast to wrangle, really. We can’t control it. You can try to improve it, though, or spice things up a bit by adding in something like toys to the mix. There are moments where we just need a little bit something more to really get in the mood, after all, so it makes sense that bringing that extra toy could help out. It’ll be up to you and your partner to decide what works for you, but hopefully these tips are at least somewhat useful for you.